I Am Forty

i am 40

Yes, I am forty. What does that mean? It means I reached an age of enlightenment and wisdom. Being 40 means that anyone under the age of 28 could technically be my son or daughter. That statement in itself changes the way you see people and how you see yourself. Being 40 means that I am not as fast or strong as I used to be but I can still play sports with people half my age with the advantage that I have nothing to prove. The pressure is all on them. If I win, they get defeated by an old man. If I lose, I’m just old. It is a win-win situation for me.

It is good to understand the advantages and limitations of your own body at any age. I am aware of mine. I do have to start working out again for health purposes. I am really not concerned about the beauty aspects of working out because it really doesn’t get any better than this. My only concern is giving away my favorite jeans because my voice changes if I wear them. If I didn’t look like Hugh Jackman 10 years ago, it is not going to happen in the next 10 years. I take smart over handsome any day because smart gets better with age, handsome is just a path downhill after certain age. Either way I’m happy with my appearance. I just need to do my part to stay healthy.

Going back to how you see yourself and others, I think Paul provided a guideline to Timothy (1 Timothy 5:1-2) that transcends any age:

Do not rebuke an older man harshly, but exhort him as if he were your father. Treat younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity.

I am very happy to make it until today. It is going to be a regular busy day with all the blessings as any other day, but I’m glad I can be close to my wife and kids, what I have and what I do, and what I have to do. Here is for another day, celebrating each day like the last, but working as if I have 100 more years to live. The plan is to be 40 until I turn 50.

Faded Creativity

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I had the chance to participate in a great event called Minds in Motion sponsored by the Connecticut Association for the Gifted. This is an event that offers workshops for children from kindergarten to 8th grade as well as presentations for the parents. I was providing clay sculpting workshops to 2 groups of children: the first group was 5th and 6th graders, and the second 7th and 8th graders. I had about 15 kids in the first workshop and 6 in the second. These kids went through 100lbs of clay in 3 hours creating all kinds of things that came to their minds from dinosaurs, to airplanes, vases, bass-relief sculptures, princesses, cobras, and many other things.

IMG_5311.JPGThis event was a lot of fun. There were very talkative children and very quiet ones. I was worried the kids in the first group would use all the clay leaving nothing to the second group. Their creations were very imaginative and they produced one thing after another. Some challenged themselves creating large pieces. The girls created less and smaller pieces than the boys but focused on providing details to the pieces. The first workshop was very dynamic and entertaining. We talked about cartoons, movies, made jokes about out names, music,  and some of them were even singing at times. The second group presented a different dynamic.

The kids in the second group were very funny and nice but the conversations were more focused on books. They were very quiet in contrast with the first group. The conversations were less and shorter. Their creations showed faded creativity. Their pieces were fewer, smaller, and took them longer to decide what to create. They created pieces of more practical things like pencil holders. They also created books and an airplane, and a few bases, and something else with angel wings and a mermaid tail.

What does this mean? What conclusions could be reached from these observations? I am not certain it is enough information to reach definite conclusions but it is a good start for exploration of creative tendencies within the age differences, gender, developmental states, interests, and socialization. It could be interesting to see how they create in isolation in comparison with the group dynamics too. I guess my researcher mind was very present during the workshops as much as the artist and the teacher. In all, it was a great afternoon with wonderful children. I am thankful for the opportunity.

Last Weekend

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Everything comes to an end. Maybe not everything but a lot of things do. It is all about the transitions and changes in life and if we understand them we can move swiftly to the next step. There must be an end before there is a beginning and the time has come for mine. A new era is about to begin. People in their 30’s, I am leaving you behind to join the 40’s. This is my last weekend with you. No big deal, right? Monday morning I’ll wake up, if God allows me to, ready to face a new decade.

I would love to write about life in the 40’s but I have no idea what that is like. Nevertheless, I can talk to you about my 30’s. The 30’s was a great decade for me. A lot of things happened in 10 years. I completed a masters and a doctorate in education, raised a beautiful girl and a handsome boy who made me the dad of a teenager. I went over the 15 year mark of marriage what makes us, my wife and I, semi-pros in the marriage and parenting thing. If that wasn’t enough, I also began my art career in this decade.

Becoming 40 this year means that I lived longer in the previous century and the previous millennium than in this one. I’ve seen the evolution of cellphones and video games. I was there when ‘taping’ sound projects meant exactly that, before the computer came in. I survived Y2K and 2012 and nothing was as bad as people said. I lived through the last 5 presidents of the United States of America, and 3 popes. I also lived in 2 different states.

How is it going to be in the 40’s? I don’t know. I live one day at a time and so far I made it through almost 14,600 of them. I do know that the future glory will be greater than the first and the best is yet to come. There are plans and goals ahead and many adventures to face but the journey is what matters.

Those Smiles

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We had a great sculpting night at Café Atlantique (33 River St, Milford, CT) last Wednesday night. We had so much fun. It was an awesome group. Some people cancelled because of impending weather but we just got some rain during the event and things were warm and cozy inside as people sipped some wine, had a good cappuccino, and sculpted a female torso. Those two hours go by so fast by the end of it people want to stay a little longer. The smiles at the end are so satisfying to me. It is worth every minute of it.

11010593_10155293483370352_7440515067777015510_nThere is so much more to it than just sculpting. People discover a new way of relaxing and having a good time. The opportunity to socialize is great since people can’t really be on their phones that much unless they want clay all over it. Above all of that there is a sense of challenge and satisfaction that grows inside. You can see it in their faces. They are challenging themselves to transmit to their hands what they see with their eyes and what they perceive with their minds. Once immerse in it time flies by. Two hours don’t seem enough when people is having fun.

march 4bFor me is a little longer than two hours. I have to prepare the bases we use, make sure the supplies are ready, and get there earlier to set up. During the party I’m trying to keep them entertained telling stories and making jokes (that’s the stand up comedy reminiscences in me). At the end I stay longer to help clean up and organize. It is a lot of work and not as easy as it might look, but I love it so much. Those smiles at the end are so satisfying to me. It is worth every minute of it. The comments the day after and beyond are very encouraging. Can’t wait to do it again.

Check out the next sculpting and painting parties.

Gravity

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I get compliments on my art when it shows the effects of gravity on the female body. The term I see the most in the comments is “real women”. These compliments come generally from females. I believe it is simple physics and the fact that there are so many body types. Where there is mass there will be the effect of gravity. I honestly don’t like when things that should fall are trying to levitate against nature. I consider natural as more beautiful. This is accepted by many women in theory but for some reason when it comes to judge themselves, this reality is no longer accepted. Why is that? I wish I had an answer.

IMG_5181.JPGAround 85% of my followers in social media and about 95% of the participants of the sculpting and painting parties are females. From people who acquired my art so far is a very similar statistic. When he buys a piece of art from me is for her. You can see my gravitation towards the female figure in my art and I think that is a connection most women perceive, but it is not only with my art. Back in college it was me and a lot of girls in almost every class. They could talk about anything shamelessly and even involve me in the conversations. That still happens today. Teaching or taking a class I am generally the only male. Recently, my wife took me to a gathering that looked like a girls’ night out. Allegedly, other guys were invited but I was the only one there.

IMG_5198.JPGI was a manager on a OB-GYN office therefore no female conversation is scary to me. Nevertheless, I keep trying to convince myself that it is not weird at all and that I am used to it. Honestly, it feels like some kind of calling I can’t still fathom. We all, not only women, need to understand that we are all different for a reason, that nature and natural is a beautiful thing. If you are 40 and you don’t feel or look 20, there is a very simple explanation for that: You are not 20. We age, we change, and gravity affects us all. A ‘perfect body’ is ephemeral fantasy and trying to ‘fix it’ doesn’t make It more beautiful. Moreover, no matter how much we try to fix it we will never be satisfied, because the problem is not on the outside but in the inside.